Sand

I always get so jealous of the people that seem to have all this time for personal reflection and brilliant blog posts because of it. I can't remember the last time I've been able to go to the *insert place for reflection here* and just take time to be quiet and…reflect. To be honest though, I never really make time for it either. I'm a firm believer in the fact that you will have time for what you make time for. It's completely in your control. And when I do have time that's not scheduled away, I schedule it away to spending time with friends rather than any personal time. I'm definitely the kind of person that re-charges through relationships and investing in my relationships with friends and family.

But when I read about a beautifully serene afternoon at the beach, or reading a good book, or hiking in the mountains or the dunes…I do feel like I'm missing out. I realize that maybe I would be doing myself some good to carve some of my time out for me, myself and I.

I have an especially hard time with reflection in the winter. To me, the perfect setting for time alone would be a hike out through the woods and dunes to the beach on a warm fall day. Really getting in a healthy work out and then just resting, relaxing…breathing…on the beach. I ache for the smell of the water and the sound of the waves lapping up on the shore. I miss the feeling of the sand between my toes. I love raking my fingers through it as I sit and think. There is something therapeutic and awe inspiring to me about sand. I mean, have you ever thought about it? Have you ever tried to wrap your mind around how many billions and billions of grains of sand each beach has? And sand isn't even contained in just beaches…

It's concepts like sand that make me rest in my salvation and my God. He is so much bigger, so much more diverse, so much deeper than I can ever wrap my mind around. And as overwhelming as it seems it could be to not even begin to fathom a smidgen of who God is…it is actually comforting to me. I don't think I would want to be able, in my extremely limited perspective, to understand the Creator of the Universe. It is a beautiful thing to know that God has things in store that I couldn't begin to imagine…and he proves that through glimpses of things like sand. How can I know how many grains of sand there are? How can anyone? How can anyone know what God has in store when he clearly takes such joy in creating things as simple and as intricate…as sand? There is a freedom in the trust that that requires. A freedom that I rarely take joy in. A freedom that I rarely allow my heart to rejoice and rest in.

And right now? Today. I might just be sitting at my computer typing out a blog entry…by my heart is at the beach. Loving my beautiful, Creator.